My xmas wish list

There has been this Christmas wish list meme thingie making the rounds, and I felt kind of uncomfortable with posting a list of things I'd like, because I tend to oscillate between a complete inability to accept presents without feeling inadequate and undeserving and honor bound to pay back the kindness with interest, and utter greed. I suppose you could say that I desire many things, but rarely feel like I actually deserve them. Personally I believe that's a gender related brainwashing thing my family did to me. My granny, who I loved dearly, was the great martyr who always came last and who always acted like a sunflower, turning wherever those in her care were. (i.e. me) So, if you're female, grown up, a wife, and a mom you're basically supposed to give up your own wishes and make those of your family your own. That's the theory and the lofty ideal that the females in my family tried to drum in my head. The thing is, I'm kind of stuck in the middle. On one hand I think that's a stupid ideal, because hey, moms are people too, on the other hand I feel guilty for not happily living up to that ideal.

Which is why it took me so long to decide if I wanted to post a list or not. But hey, all the cool people on my flist did it, so why not me. And I promise I shall list things I truly want, not things that will look good on my resumé. :-)

( Step One )

( Step Two )

I think this is a wonderful idea.

( My ten holiday wishes for Christmas )

*sigh* Last year at this time, ladycat777 were busily collaborating on a Xmas ensemble fic. Man, that was fun. I dusted off our old icon. I think I will reread our story soon, maybe that will put me into a proper Christmas spirit.

FIC: Dealing 9b & 9c (partial repost) - Ethan/Lindsey

ATTENTION! In last night's update I screwed up my timeline. Which is why I spent this morning fiddling with parts 9b and 9c (unposted), making sure that the death Ethan senses in the distance takes place at the correct time of day (yeah, I know, it's kinda anal, but I can't help it, screw ups like this annoy me). This is therefore a partial repost, i.e. a mix of what I posted last night and a new scene. Sorry about the mixup. If you missed the last few posts, just ignore the one posted under 9b and go straight to this one.

Ethan/Lindsey - NC-17 - slash

Chapters 1-8 are here. Yesterday morning's update 9a is here.

( Part 9b & 9c - Lines )

Guess what our fish are called....

After one week of letting the plants in our aquarium grow and change the water into a habitable environment, we bought the first few fish today. We bought four metal-colored cory cats (German: Metall Panzerwels) and two black catfish (Antennenwelse) with white dots (very pretty).

Now, can you guess what our little fish are called? Well? I shall give you a hint. Their names have a weird meta quality. All six are little white hats who have a distinct service to perform. They keep the world clean for the other fish. Of the jolly corys, three always hang out together, the fourth keeps apart. The two black ones immideately moved to opposite corners of the large aquarium to sulk, but now they are happily occupying and sharing the middle of the aquarium, where a root and a stone give them a snug place. They aren't exactly cuddling, but they do share a territory.
I'll give you another hint. Since the four cory cats are impossible to distinguish from each other they all have the same name. Well? A cupie doll for you if you can guess their names.

*smiles happily.* I love our little fishies.

PS: Hubby suggested the names. I love my hubby.