Bigamism

[estepheia]

I want to be a bigamist. I want to have three husbands. Mr. E can handle the kids, husband #2 can earn (or have) oodles of money, and husband #3 has to bring useful skills into the marriage like a) massaging skills (I'm sure the other two husbands will agree that a masseur is a great asset), and b) the ability to hypnotize me and ask me where I left things.
I just spent half an hour looking for something. A few months ago I tilted the contents of one of our boardgames into a box or carrier, I don't remember which, and either threw them away, or hid them somewhere. The kids had, as usual, neglected to properly return the parts to the box and I decided to teach them a lesson. The idea was that the next time they decided to play the game they'd discover that the pieces to be gone. They'd be suffieciently shocked and resolve to be more tidy in the future. Yeah, not one of my brightest moments. Now the box is empty except for the rule book and the board itself. Hmmm. I'm pretty sure I didn't throw the pieces and cards away, but sometimes, when my temper is particularly filthy, I get a little *cough* irrational.
When my mother got into one of her moods she used to open all my cupboards and sweep the entire contents on the floor, not caring whether my doll china broke etc. - can't say the method was very effective. I still have to force myself to tidy up properly. (Which is one of the reasons why I really don't want to tidy up my kids' crap as well)
I've never done anything as drastic as that, but I do get stern when my kids don't tidy their room. After all, how am I supposed to put the clean laundry into their wardrobes when I can't even navigate through their room?
*sigh* and the oscar for the most dull domestic LJ post goes to...

ETA: Found the contents. Phew. And daughter #2 just meticulously sorted the cards and pieces back into the Candamir-Box. :-)

Comments

[harmonyfb.livejournal.com]

I want to have three husbands.

You're kidding. There are days I can barely cope with the one. Can't imagine three of 'em leaving their dirty underwear in the living room floor.

Now three wives...I told Manly that the more kids I have, the more attractive polygamy looked. ;)

[tx-cronopio.livejournal.com]

Just waving hi to you and giggling over your post.

Husbands. Yep, a mixed bag!

[babyotto.livejournal.com]

I take it the game was Candamir.

What is it like? We have the other Settlers games but haven't had a chance to try it out yet (although I was in the same room as a copy over the weekend). I'm a little nervous as I get frustrated with Settlers these days - it's a bit dice-reliant for me.

[riani1.livejournal.com]

I've heard many a good thing about Settlers, but I've yet to try it.

I want a wife, too. Somebody to clean house. Heck, she can even sleep with Hubby, but not in my bed. He can go do her on the couch while I get some real sleep.

[darkhavens.livejournal.com]

Ah, you don't want to be bigamous, you want to be polyandrous!

Polyandry is the having of multiple husbands, a wonderful plan I have entertained before now, though of course, given my recent proclivities, not only do I want one to bring in the money, one to look after the kids, and one to do the housework, I also want them willing and able to shag each other blind while I watch/direct/participate when I feel like it. *g*

[hobbituk.livejournal.com]

I was an annoying child for my non-reading mother. I always had my head in a book. At the table. Under the covers in bed. I drove her mad, because I frequently completely ignored her when she spoke to me.

One day (I now realise it must have been a PMS day) she asked me three or four times to come to the table for dinner. I continued to read and ignored her. Eventually, in a complete temper, she grabbed the book out of my hands and threw it onto the open fire I was sitting next to. "Now what have you got to say??" she exclaimed. "That was a library book...." I answered. It cost her a fortune to replace the book, and I was in the dog house for weeks.

[aayesha-r.livejournal.com]

When my oops-baby sister was born, and everything that we didn't want her to have went up. Most often, up on the mantle. My mother was forever telling us to clear it off, and one time when she got tired of waiting for us to do it, she threw everything away. That included money, library books (thankfully paperbacks), earrings, etc. It got our attention, all right, and I had to pay for the library books myself. We were all a little wary of my mother after that, for some time.